"So I'm Dating a Disc Golfer" Standardized Dating Agreement 2013 Edition
My name is______(datee). I have recently met, and it is my intenion to begin a dating relationship with disc golfer number______(please provide all applicable disc golf club identification numbers), whose name is__________(dator), more commonly known on the course as___________(nickname). I have read the following agreement and agree to be bound by all terms disclosed herein. If, at any time,any violation of the following terms occurs,I fully understand that this relationship can and will be terminated at will and in the sole discretion of the disc golfer.
#1 Plastic is sacred and shall be treated as such. I shall not discard, throw while in a fit of anger, or in any way, shape, form or fashion damage any disc with which I come into contact. This especially holds true for any collectible discs, special hotstamped discs, prize discs, or any discs bearing autographs.
#2 "League night"(which I understand may extend up to as many as seven (7) nights per week) is also sacred. If, on any given day, Dator should utter the phrase "League night," I fully understand that I shall without question plan to do something else with my time for at least the following six (6).hours. I shall not bitch moan, complain or in any way discourage the attendance of this sacred worship service by Dator.
#3 I understand that all discs and disc golf related items are the sole separate property of Dator and that under no circumstance, whether by marriage, birth, promise, or accident, shall any legal interest whatssoever in said items be transferred to myself.
#4 I understand and agree to make no comment whatsoever regarding an behavior involving golf discs that I may consider to be bizarre or strange, including, but certainly not limited to: using discs as plates, hanging disc on the walls of the home, holding discussions with particular discs (usually a putter), sleeping with discs in the bed (also usually a favorite putter(, or cursing/mourning over the loss of a disc.
#5 Tournament weekends are also sacred...period. I will not beg to attend such event, and I shall not bother Dator with harassing phone calls or visits while he/she is attending such event. I shall not complain upon his/her return.
#6 I shall endure, participate in, and even encourage discussions about disc golf at any and all times that the same shall be initiated by Dator. I understand that this is my duty as a disc golf Datee, and I shall abide by the terms of that position as they are pointed out to me (in detail) by Dator.
#7 I understand that scheduling conflicts occurring between anything I want to do and any sacred event related (even remotely) to disc golf shall be resolved in favor of the disc golf rated event...without question, discussion, dirty looks, or the withholding of sexual favors.
#8 I understand and agree that on any out-of-town trip or vacation that Dator will be allowed and even encouraged to bring along his/her disc golf equipment/necessities and will be given free reign to visit any and all disc golf courses in the area and/or along the way that he/she had never played before. I will support such activity with great enthusiasm as I understand that Dator's visits to these new sites of worship will be of great inspiration and value to Dator's spiritual well-being.
#9 I understand and accept that the purchase of new or replacement discs, payment of league fees (including mulligans and ace pot entry), payment of tournament entry fees, and all other necessary items needed to participate in disc golf throughout the year are non-negotiable with regard to any household budget that may be developed. I will not question the expenditure of these funds as I understand they are necessary to Dator's spiritual growth and development.
#10 I understand that the sound of chains is closely akin to the ringing of chimes or bells at a Church service. The sound is one of religious reverence and should be respected as such without comment. I will not complain about this sound no matter what time of night it is ringing through the air, from the backyard ,or elsewhere.
#11 I accept all of the following with regard to any and all disc golf friends of Dator: they are my friends as we, they shall be welcome in our home after recreational rounds, tournament play, and/or to crash on the floors and couch when in town foe a tournament. I shall not pass judgment on any of Dator's friends.
#12 I understand that this represents the entire agreement between the parties herein. Amendments to this agreement may be made only in writing and upon a two-thirds (2/3) majority vote by thr current disc golf club to which Dator is a member. There shall be no right of appeal.
Signed and Acknowledged this the____day of _______________, 20__.
__________Datee. __________ Dator.
