That looks better to me.
Just a general point and SW might take you elsewhere to work on it specifically: I'm not sure you're ever fully balanced on the rear leg before you transition forward. Fundamental balance issue: overall your move lacks a lot of the "North-South" balanced tilt I mention in the post here. Whole body needs to shift back and forth with this tilt to allow your mechanics to align better. I'm becoming a believer that no time spent reinforcing this is wasted.
TL;DR: If you're already an elite athlete and top 50 thrower on tour, you're probably doing this well enough. Congratulations! If not, maybe there's a nugget or two in here you will find instructive, but it's mostly a form theory thread. "Just do it" if you actually want to learn and Understand...
www.dgcoursereview.com
Can work on it in:
-Reverse Stride
-Double Dragon/Can Can/Kick the Ball
-Turbo Encabulator
This is the front shoulder shunting "up" toward the sky as a compensation rather than being in balanced tilt like some of the examples in that thread. The leading shoulder will be higher relative to the ground than the rear shoulder, but that's because of the way the entire balance of the move works going foot to foot. I think generally people tend to have a hard time detecting the difference before they work hard on the North-South direction of the tilt in the big drill moves so I'm seeing if it sparks any inspiration for you.
Notice your shoulder line at odds with your pelvis compared to Paul. I think your balance is somewhere trapped behind your plant foot to compensate as you enter the release whereas Paul is fully balanced in the tilt across his whole body (rightmost image). He has the North-South part of the tilted balance going into backswing and swing in his move.
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