Getting married...and she says I have too much plastic! Advice?

[DiscGolfCraig]

The best advice I can give you is don't sell (unless you really need/want the money to pay for the honeymoon). I haven been married for 2 years but we were together for 4 years before that and when I started playing as long as my bills and our needs were taken care of I would spend money on DG. When I do want a disc now I sell discs that I don't want/need/use to pay for the new one. Someone said give and take.

Seems like the first response from any else who is married. Sorry single guys, you're pretty much out of the loop on this one.

Speaking as a married one, it's all about priorities. Giving her the benefit of the doubt (otherwise you wouldn't be marrying her), I'm guessing she has a reason behind her feelings.

She probably thinks you own too many discs. I'm guessing she's a non-DGer, and in that case, probably thinks owning more than say 20 discs is too many. If you have 100 discs, it wouldn't kill you to give some up. You'd miss them, yes, but, you'd get over it. After all, do you want to pick a fight over a disc you got in a tourney 5 years ago that you've never used?

Maybe a good compromise, if you don't want to sell them, would be to box them up and keep them out of sight. Or simply sell them. Weddings aren't cheap, you know.

Good luck with the wedding. Spending the rest of your life with the right person is far better than anything DG-related.

 

[Martin Dewgarita]

quick go out and buy some stock stamp stuff, like 100 discs. then make a compromise with her that you'll sell half of your stock. pull out your secret stash, sell them all for cost or better, if you plan it out right you can make a profit, find another guy on craigslist in the same situation that broke down, buy a lot of 60 discs, turn them for a profit. Both happy.

 

[Goatman]

Is she going to part with some of her "collection" to help pay for the honeymoon? If she is then you should too.

Would she be willing to sell her bling to buy you a basket? Not saying she has to, just asking how she would feel if the tables were turned.

I have been married for 16 years and my wife doesn't play. She does encourage me to continue my hobby. She bought my first 3 baskets and gives me discs for birthdays and such.

I support her hobby, she supports mine.

 

[jasonc]

How many? I'm not sure...maybe 100 to 150. Excessive I know, but nothing compared to what some people on here have.

There's gotta be some married dudes on here with this problem. What do you say to the lady when you wanna buy some more sweet plastic?

Which brings me to a second question...possibly a new thread: how much plastic is too much plastic and what to do you feel is excessive?

My wedding was 10-30-10. Do NOT go on the honeymoon the day after the wedding unless you absolutely have to plan it this way b/c of job restrictions or other issues. This will give you an opportunity to use cash gifts that trickle in after the wedding on your honeymoon vacation. We took ours in Amsterdam 6 months after the wedding...and played a round at Sloterpark DGC while we were there. Also saw plenty of museums and stores that were chosen by her.

Before I met my wife back in 2006, I had about 80--100 discs. Now I have approx 150--175. Typically, I do not seek her permission before buying new plastic. I know what we can afford and obviously the bills must be paid before I spend any $$$ on new plastic.

However, all of my discs are stored 99% of the time. I have found that this is essential to keeping her complaints to a minimum. Out of sight = out of mind.

I'm sure things will change again around May because baby #1 is on the way. However, I am still not planning to sell anything out of my collection.

 

[Midnightbiker]

My wife pays $40 every 3-4 weeks to get her nails done. I don't say a word. When I come home with plastic and gets some in the mail, she doesn't say a word. She knows if I let her spend the money on her nails, I get to spend money on plastic.

Plus, I love her nails done up, but I am not telling her that.

 

[dkoz]

Plastic is already payed for, so just tell her you wont buy anymore until you get that full time job!

 

[sloppydisc]

If she doesn't understand your plastic, then she doesn't understand you. If you are going to sell your plastic to make her happy, you're doomed. You'll end up one of those guys that never sees his friends again, and is a miserable bum for life. either explain your hobby to her so that she is cool with it, or find a new woman.

But you should DG responsibly. If you aren't working full time, you shouldn't be loading up on new plastic. Food, bills and savings come first. Man up.

 

[Johnny Conservative]

I think she is right.....you should send them to me. Thanks. I will PM my address to you.

 

[blazerico]

Was married for 12 years, now divorced for almost one...my only advice is to KEEP SEPARATE BANK ACCOUNTS! You each spend your own money on whatever you want and don't complain about each others habits...you will be much happier that way. As far as selling a couple of discs to fund a honeymoon, that is rediculous unless you are planning a real crappy honeymoon.

 

[Agricolae]

Yes, Kyle, that dress does, in fact, make your butt look fat.

 

[lxdawg25]

Plastic is already payed for, so just tell her you wont buy anymore until you get that full time job!

Been married for 4 years, ^ this is what I was thinking for the most part.

I will say though that this is all 100% tone dependent. If she's putting her foot down and being rude about it, I'd think twice, but if she's willing to talk about it, or even just let it be when you tell her how important it is to you, then I think it's reasonable. But getting married you're going to have to make a sacrifice or two. Again this is a small issue if she's a screaming harpy over it run. I really doubt that's the issue and honestly selling a few CE's or something like that can bring in some coin for the honeymoon, which you can both enjoy, that might be a really nice gesture.

The 100% best martial advice I can give you though, is do not ask martial advice on DGCR. Especially when it's about DG, you're just asking for a plastic divorce this way.

 

[bhuff]

So your getting married to a girl who isn't close enough to you to have seen your whole stash? I to am getting married, and sure she thinks I have to much plastic...but doesn't really care. She knows its all stuff I've aquired in tournies and what not.

 

[Doupie620]

Did I hear a

WHIPCRACK!?!?

Whip it! Whip it good!

 

[Lewis]

"PASS!!!"

Two hearts.

 

[DSmith]

Good thing she doesn't know about the shed out back full of porno

 

[kyledstauffer]

My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday.

Favorite post so far! This thread is getting waaayyy to serious...I was hoping it'd be kinda fun

 

[blazerico]

Favorite post so far! This thread is getting waaayyy to serious...I was hoping it'd be kinda fun

Hahaha! Dude, marriage is probably the most serious, life changing decision you'll ever make besides the choice to have kids.

 

[WVA Texan]

Aren't you a little too young to be getting married? Seriously, its great to find that special person whom you want to share the rest of your life with. I have been married over 31 years. While my wife plays some dg, especially on vacation where we find 2-3 courses on the route (Cincinnati & Louisville last year), she has other hobbies. Life is about compromise. Not only with the wife, but also with future children. You need to pick your battles. I don't think that you have any more discs than I have, but there are no complaints from the wife. While we use a joint checking account, we agree to discuss any purchases over a given amount (I believe about $200.). But we are open as to those purchases. While she supports my hobby (I'm also retired), our main expense relates to her hobby, which is riding her horse. For me, she can't really complain about any disc purchases (most of mine are through e-bay) since she (with my approval) just purchased a new horse (a 3-year old) for over $10,000. Bottom line is that your decisions need to be win-win situations for the family. I'm not suggesting that you purchase jewlery in excess of $10,000 for your future wife; however, I hope that both of you can agree to disagree at this time, without resulting in future resentment. You need to support each other's needs. Good luck.

 

[harr0140]

If you dont see that having an abundance of plastic is an issue . . then you do have a problem . . . unless it is the only thing you spend money on frivolously then it is ok. I cannot justify a lot of discs because I also play golf, so i am looking to unload. Need some more discs???

 

[harr0140]

On another note . . if you are asking for advice on a disc golf website you are looking for answers in the wrong place of course we will justify your addiction to plastic. Maybe go see a counselor or a priest or your parents!