Playing a tourney with your toddler

[Quinum]

I am the father of two boys, and there is no way I would bring my 2.5 y/o along for a tournament. Casual rounds with buddies? Sure! But, no, not in a competitive tournament environment where people are paying to be there.

 

[ferretdance03]

Father of 3 here, 6yrs/4yrs/19months. As others have said, no way I would consider taking any of them to a sanctioned tournament. I typically only have any of them along on casual rounds with my regular golfing buddies as well, as I know they won't be bothered by minor distractions or multiple snack breaks.

 

[TheOtherBill]

My 10-month old is a PDGA member. Even though she can't walk or throw disc, who are you to tell me she can't play in a sanctioned tournament?
They took her(my) money for the membership, so now she (I) wants to play!

My 2 year old, however, I can't even take to a course with other players on it for a rec round- he'll bother the hell out of everyone. Plus he doesn't have a membership yet.

 

[Jimb]

Sadly, most two year olds are a courtesy violation waiting to happen. Not the kid's fault. They're two for Pete's sake. But responsible parenting, and living, isn't always easy to come by.

I'm much kinder and gentler than I was before I had a kid. But misbehaving kids in public still get to me... Almost as much as their parents get to me.

Now, let me get off my soap box. My 11 year old daughter (now) just started playing more last year. She played in a small local league and did very well. She is quiet in general, which was good. But what made me proud was how aware she was of courtesy towards other players. Knowing that her drives were generally shorter than most, she would frequently run to her disc to take her next shot, hoping to avoid causing delays. I can't wait to get her into a mixed doubles tournament sometime.

 

[frasnow]

Sadly, most two year olds are a courtesy violation waiting to happen. Not the kid's fault. They're two for Pete's sake. But responsible parenting, and living, isn't always easy to come by.

In my experience the 2 year olds are great. It's the 3 year olds that go nuts. Terrible twos, I don't think so.

 

[Jimb]

In my experience the 2 year olds are great. It's the 3 year olds that go nuts. Terrible twos, I don't think so.

Agreed. That's why I didn't use the phrase "terrible twos."

Some kids would be fine at 18 months. Some wouldn't be at 18 years. LOL.

 

[coupe]

I'll have to disagree. His child is an extension of him and he brought him along. Therefore he should be held liable for his actions. As in warnings and strokes if it came down to it.

This isn't about whether or not a player should be liable for the actions an individual who is considered an extension of a player, it is, in the first place, about whether or not a player should be liable for the actions of any and every spectator who is NOT an extension of the player but merely following his or her card and cheering for the player, and in the second place, about how low or high the bar distinguishing specators who are extensions of a player and spectators who aren't should be: is cheering for Player A more enthusiastically than Players B, C, and D sufficient grounds to make Spectator X an extension of Player A? What about wearing a "Player A" shirt/hat? Carrying a "Player A"-autographed disc/mini? Waving a "Player A" towel? Talking with Player A between holes?

Again, unless and until the PDGA starts issuing official specator passes to players to hand out to their "crew" to distinguish them from random fanboy/girl who just showed up, they should not be responsible for their specators' actions since a player has no way of controlling or restricting the actions of fans who show up to watch/support him or her.

 

[sidewinder22]

 

[sscarmana]

I've played with my 2 dogs before and that was anoying having to drag them around for 18 holes. The most I've gotten through with my 2 yo is about 5 holes. He likes being out there and picking up discs for a while, but he gets bored and crabby pretty quickly. Kids are a lot tougher to drag around than dogs. I can't imagine why anyone would want to play a competitive round with either. Just too much of a distraction for the player, not even including the card mates.

 

[mark996]

I took my hyper ass yorkie with me for a practice solo round once, I can't fathom toting around a baby or toddler. Not just for the annoying (probably not the best word to describe a baby) factor but having to tend to them during the round etc. I guess it's really up to each person individually, I wouldn't really care much about a little kid being out there, screaming or anything since I put my earbuds in before each throw and can adjust volume accordingly. I think the family atmosphere is awesome in disc golf, my 3 boys love to play, and if it's between not playing a tournament and bring a kid along, I'd support bring the kid along. If it's a local C tier or non sanctioned event at least. Maybe A Tiers...probably shouldn't.

 

[Steve West]

This isn't about whether or not a player should be liable for the actions an individual who is considered an extension of a player, it is, in the first place, about whether or not a player should be liable for the actions of any and every spectator who is NOT an extension of the player but merely following his or her card and cheering for the player, and in the second place, about how low or high the bar distinguishing specators who are extensions of a player and spectators who aren't should be: is cheering for Player A more enthusiastically than Players B, C, and D sufficient grounds to make Spectator X an extension of Player A? What about wearing a "Player A" shirt/hat? Carrying a "Player A"-autographed disc/mini? Waving a "Player A" towel? Talking with Player A between holes?

Again, unless and until the PDGA starts issuing official specator passes to players to hand out to their "crew" to distinguish them from random fanboy/girl who just showed up, they should not be responsible for their specators' actions since a player has no way of controlling or restricting the actions of fans who show up to watch/support him or her.

What about a general requirement for all players to make a reasonable effort to assist in removing distractions?

Shushing your friends would seem reasonable. As would notifying the owner of the car with the alarm going off, if you know who it is and how to contact them. Or finding childcare. Or stomping on a plastic bag that is about to blow across the tee.

 

[BrotherDave]

If the toddler is PDGA approved, passes the flex test, under the weight limit, etc, I don't see how you couldn't play a tourney with it.

 

[sidewinder22]

Would thou TD have to knight thy toddler as caddy?

 

[mark996]

Would thou TD have to knight thy toddler as caddy?

If the toddler picked up a disc and dropped it...would it be a stroke penalty or a warning at first?

I kid I kid.

 

[Steve West]

If the toddler is PDGA approved, passes the flex test, under the weight limit, etc, I don't see how you couldn't play a tourney with it.

You'd have to make 500 of them, and make them available to the public.

 

[JedV]

If the toddler is PDGA approved, passes the flex test, under the weight limit, etc, I don't see how you couldn't play a tourney with it.

:clap: Post of the day. Steve West took it a little far though...

 

[DrummerBob]

Sorry for reviving an old post. We deal with this almost weekly. We have a particular member who despite knowing that his kids are a distraction, continues to bring them to Wednesday night league.

I see several problems with this even at a non sanctioned event like a league night. If you want to go out and play a casual round with a buddy that is one thing, but if there is an organized group, leave the kids home.

1. A stray disc that would give one of us a huge gash or knot on the head could easily kill or severely injure a toddler. Even if the child is behind the group, a stray disc from another group could hit them, especially on tight courses. So there is that safety issue.

2. Knowing the toddler is on the hole next to mine has made me consciously and subconsciously alter my shot before. For example instead of throwing a big hyzer that might sweep over the fairway the other group is playing. I will try to throw a straighter shot. Or I might just shank it and throw it farther left than I had intended to be safe.

3. Even if the parent can keep the toddlers from running out in front of other players, if he's constantly scolding them for getting in the way, not minding or whatever else they are doing, that is a huge distraction.

4. The kid is going to be bored senseless and be whining about when they can go home or go play on the playground or go get an icecream etc... I would be feeling sorry for the kid. distraction.

5. If the kids are restless and not minding, chances are the dad (or mom) is not going to be on to of their game. They will become frustrated with themselves and not be in the greatest of moods. They might even blame the kids for the terrible game, causing more "awkward uncomfortable moments".

6. Even well behaved kids will slow the group down.

7. Finally. The entire group does a collective sigh (he brought them again?) when they see him walk up with his kids. In our group, it's gotten so bad that half of the league has just stopped playing. This dad knows how everyone feels, but comes anyway.

I love kids, but an organized league is no place for them. Would you let your toddler stand next to you while you play right field at a softball game? would you let them on the court if you played a basketball game? No they would be on the sidelines. And they would probably have another parent watching them. Out of the way from the action.

Bottom line is if you can't find a babysitter, leave them at home.

 

[fatty mcbutterpants]

Sorry for reviving an old post. We deal with this almost weekly. We have a particular member who despite knowing that his kids are a distraction, continues to bring them to Wednesday night league.

I see several problems with this even at a non sanctioned event like a league night. If you want to go out and play a casual round with a buddy that is one thing, but if there is an organized group, leave the kids home.

1. A stray disc that would give one of us a huge gash or knot on the head could easily kill or severely injure a toddler. Even if the child is behind the group, a stray disc from another group could hit them, especially on tight courses. So there is that safety issue.

2. Knowing the toddler is on the hole next to mine has made me consciously and subconsciously alter my shot before. For example instead of throwing a big hyzer that might sweep over the fairway the other group is playing. I will try to throw a straighter shot. Or I might just shank it and throw it farther left than I had intended to be safe.

3. Even if the parent can keep the toddlers from running out in front of other players, if he's constantly scolding them for getting in the way, not minding or whatever else they are doing, that is a huge distraction.

4. The kid is going to be bored senseless and be whining about when they can go home or go play on the playground or go get an icecream etc... I would be feeling sorry for the kid. distraction.

5. If the kids are restless and not minding, chances are the dad (or mom) is not going to be on to of their game. They will become frustrated with themselves and not be in the greatest of moods. They might even blame the kids for the terrible game, causing more "awkward uncomfortable moments".

6. Even well behaved kids will slow the group down.

7. Finally. The entire group does a collective sigh (he brought them again?) when they see him walk up with his kids. In our group, it's gotten so bad that half of the league has just stopped playing. This dad knows how everyone feels, but comes anyway.

I love kids, but an organized league is no place for them. Would you let your toddler stand next to you while you play right field at a softball game? would you let them on the court if you played a basketball game? No they would be on the sidelines. And they would probably have another parent watching them. Out of the way from the action.

Bottom line is if you can't find a babysitter, leave them at home.

Sounds like you need to nut up, throw on some headphones, and carve out an extra 30 minutes for league day. Comparing DG to other sports where the intent is to have objects thrown or propelled at you is not accurate, as that is NEVER the object of DG. Thinking that you are going to hork a disc into another tee pad is not a child concern- it is an issue with you and how you view the sport. You shouldn't be making that throw even if it is just adults in that area. Put down your Walmart bag of Pabst and throw within your limits. If you think that there is a chance you are going to land near a group, don't take the throw or forewarn them. Point #2 is invalid. You are well within your rights to wait for an obstacle or safety hazard to pass before you throw. Get more mentally tough if you insist on taking the throw. Do not complain because you choose to throw with a (percieved) hazard in play. Also, if you spend your round worried about how you perceive that the child is feeling, I would question your focus and suggest that you are using the kid as an excuse for your play. If half of your group has quit because of one child, then I have to question the entire league/group.

Yeah, kids can be annoying, but so are missed putts, tree hits, 33% of all adults you will ever play with, and all other sorts of things. Use courtesy violations and other things if the kid genuinely causes a problem, but it sounds like this has been handled improperly. What is this guy's reasoning for brining his child? Wife works at night? Single dad?

 

[discallday]

Drummer, your list of grievances makes me agree with you. I have seen parents bring kids and have no problem. I don't have any memory of parents bringing poorly behaved kids, but I can easily imagine that it occurs. Now, it is important for kids to learn to find solutions to being bored, but that's another matter...

Courtesy violations do seem like a valid approach. I don't know how much weight those would carry in your league, or if the person running the league has spoken with the parent in question (seems like that should be tried as another approach), but that's how I would think to respond.

 

[WillGrrr]

What is this guy's reasoning for brining his child?

I always brine when preparing child.